50 Shades Ain’t Got Nothing On Me

It’s time for your weekly installment of Sex, Love and Bonding. This week Alicia and I have decided to let you in on a few things that have made our marriages better.

First up, Alicia talked about how getting her man snipped after 3 kids made their sex life AMAZEBALLS (high fives to Ryan). No more worry over ovulation days and condoms. Not to mention crazy hormones on birth control. Go check out her story:

It was awkward as hell and still so funny. I remember sitting with my Dad while he barbecued dinner one night when Annika, our middle child, was around 6 months old. Ryan and I had tossed around the idea of ‘were we done at two or not?’ and the topic of vasectomies came up. Only the classiest dinner conversation at my family functions!

Ryan to my Dad (to MY DAD!!):  Then she won’t be so damn scared of getting pregnant- the frequency is bound to go up!

My Dad: ::chuckle, chuckle:: Ok, pal. Whatever you say.

Truth: getting pregnant became one of my biggest sexual fears in my marriage….[keep reading about derailing the baby train].

Next up I share my little secret I have been keeping from you for years. The world is so fascinated by 50 Shades of Grey…well ladies and gents, I have been reading this crap for years. In the series, I talk about how a few minutes reading on your phone in the waiting room at the car mechanic can revitalize your sexuality. I even give you some new newb stories to try out. Go check my story:

Hi. My name is Brandy and I have been reading erotica on my smart phone since the day I got it. Yup. Probably 3-4 years now. I actually read about the concept in an Allure magazine years ago..before smart phones. They recommended some free sites for writers. Nothing skeezy and going to throw pictures of boobs in your face. Just writing. I started reading and quickly learned it was AWESOME. I would get out of my own head for a few minutes and instantly feel sexy. If my husband was mowing the grass and I was reading, by the time he was done, I was ready to jump in the shower after him. He never knew what hit him. I would go through phases of reading discreetly on my phone constantly. Therefore, banging…constantly. Then I could stop reading because sex begets sex…and my husband is HAWT ladies.  And I guess he blamed hormones because I never told him….[keep reading about turning the sex page in your marriage].

So there you have it. If you are liking this series and want us to touch on anything specific, feel free to email me and we can see what we can do. If we can’t post, one of us is sure to be able to answer via email. No one has to know. No judging.