Zombie ApocalypseThis post has no real point but for me to rant about ALL THE THINGS. Blame it on hormones or me being a bitch whatever. I am sure Kevin never knows which to choose either.  There will be capital letters and lots of rage voices used. Hold onto your butts:

  • Changing lanes in an intersection is ILLEGAL! PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE STOP DOING IT. Nothing makes me more ragey while driving than to get over AFTER an intersection to have someone behind me change IN the intersection and get mad at ME! I am not cutting you off. I am following the fucking law, you moron.
  • <less yelly>By far, the worst part of being pregnant with a toddler is potty training. My back is KILLING me from aiming a small boy into the potty. Bless his heart that he wants to stand like Daddy but I feel all kinds of jealousy when the little girls at school just sit right down. Harumph.</less yelly>
  • When house hunting, do me a favor and READ AND LOOK AT THE PICTURES. The house is now off the market but the number of comments and/or cancellations last minute for things like “we realized it is 2 floors”  or “too much carpet” makes me want to hunt you down and give you a taco punch.
  • If you only tweet about  giveaways you entered, I will not follow you. Plain and simple. I am there to make connections with people, not inflate your stats.
  • All these damn Facebook apps to fucking read something. What the hell? AND PEOPLE INSTALL THAT SHIZ!? I think Oatmeal nailed it with their illustration of it.  I copy paste that title and put it into Google to give me the REAL article. Google wins…dumbasses.
  • Amendment One. I don’t know if something so political has pissed me off more. I am not into politics. I am non-confrontational and everyone is entitled to their own beliefs in most cases but this is just wrong. If you follow me and this rant offends you, I TRULY don’t care. Seeing the likelihood it will pass makes my stomach churn. How can I live among this kind of hate? Kids will be left with no rights under common law marriages. Spouses will not be entitled to assets in their unions. This isn’t about what you believe in the Bible or whatever. It is about Love…and who are we to label that? UGH. Please go and vote AGAINST this amendment(yes…amendment to the state constitution…this FIRST ONE EVER for this kind of backwards thinking) on May 8th. I will come drive you.

And because I like pictures, here are some more ranty ones I have saved over time:



bad decisions


caps lock


fuck this shit o clock

Happy Friday Everybody!


UPDATE: Kevin sent me this in correlation with Amendment 1. Maybe we can sing this at the polls this afternoon:


  1. Well, if any one east of you needs a ride to vote against Amendment One, refer me. I will drive them. I can’t remember the last time something political put so much grit in my craw. I’m hoping the common sense of people will prevail. I’ll stop now – I could get carried away.

  2. I want to quote you! And send it to EVERYONE I KNOW! I am so pissed about this Amendment I can’t even talk about it – it’s infuriating! This is backwards, hateful… and the way it’s been twisted just makes me want to hurl.

    • The sad part I see happening is how few people are educating themselves beyond the commercials they see on tv. If they sat down and reviewed the bill and the process it has been through (NC General Assembly bill S-514) people would see the details and why it’s so effing backwards.

  3. I mean, I’m in agreement with everything here, but the most awesome thing about this post is that bit where you tell me how to read the articles on Facebook without downloading those damn reader apps. You have changed my life. Before, I’d just sit there and battle with myself about do I want to know what Kate Winslet and Lindsay Lohan have in common enough to install the app? I can’t believe I didn’t think of Google. This must be like like what Moses must have felt like when that burning bush said, “You know, the Israelites don’t HAVE to be slaves.” He must have been all, “Why didn’t I think of this before!” That’s how I feel. You were my burning bush today… (And I’m referring to shrubbery, not any gynecological issues.) Thanks for that.

  4. Pingback: Amendment One: Don’t Embarrass Me, North Carolina « Family Building With a Twist

  5. Must be something in the air because my post today was all ranty also!

    You are so cute that you let Landon stand. One set of wet shoes and we stopped letting them even try to stand to pee. Day care doesn’t let them stand so we just set the rule that they had to sit. Now they stand because HELLO URINALS. Best part of being a boy mom, never having to take boys to the potty because all the urinals are in the men’s room.

    I think that someecard at the top might be my all-time favorite. I might have to order a print for my office.

    And…. I think I am going to post that if you vote FOR amendment one, not only do I not want your photography business, you can feel free to unfriend yourself from me on Facebook, twitter, and stop talking to me in real life.

  6. Thank you SO much for the laughter today. I can’t believe someone actually said “Too much carpet.” WTF? I have long had a theory that our reading comprehension is deteriorating but apparently our ability to look at a picture and understand it is going as well. Soon we’ll be blind morons. Maybe the zombie apocalypse wouldn’t be a bad thing. Related: at daycare drop-off today, a hipster dad climbed out of a car with an “I heart zombies” sticker on it.

  7. I am so with you on all of that, minus the toddler, since we don’t have one.

    The changing lanes in an intersection burns me too. The reader apps on FB are beyond obnoxious, so are the people who only tweet giveaways. & while we’re at it, let’s throw in those who constantly retweet & quote tweets. Don’t even start me on the Amendment.

    See? You’re in good, ragey company. Where’s 5 o’clock? I need a drink.

  8. My driving rant – if it’s rush hour and you’re too scared to drive the speed limit, GET OFF THE ROAD.

  9. My boy child pees sitting down. I do NOT have the energy to clean up that much freaking piss right now – he can work on his aim outside in the bushes this summer and THEN he can try it inside.

    The worst part about the Facebook reader apps is then people SEE WHAT I’M READING. I don’t WANT all my friends to know I’m only interested in celebrity marriages, turtles born with three heads and cute kitten pictures instead of politics and world hunger.

    • Part of it is nice because I have never been good at getting him aimed right sitting down either. More messes that way actually. And sitting backwards works if he never wore pants.

  10. Boom to this rant! All of it. But the most boom goes to the last e-card. Pretty much all the time is Fuck this shit o’clock for me. All the time.

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