Well today is Oliver’s first day to test out daycare. When I was out with Landon, I had him start going earlier (because of our subsidy, we start paying at 6 weeks regardless if we are going to hold the spot). I used it to help ward off some anxiety and get some me time. At the same time, it made me a better parent. I went and watched trained professionals take care of 8 infants at a time! I saw trick and tips on how to do things. I just sat in the rocking chair or on the floor and watched. It was something I recommend to any new working mama if you can do it. I learned right then the true meaning of “every baby is different”. While mine has a shrieking cry, he was more interactive than some. It made me appreciate him more, honestly.
So today I am going to drop off all his stuff: paperwork, clothes, pacis, diapers, etc. and hang. Get to know his new teachers. See the other babies he will be with. Be reminded of the little milestones to come in the first year. I’m going to nurse him in the nursing room across the hall (I KNOW! RIGHT?!?!). THEN? I am going running with Jamie and then maybe eat lunch…with 2 hands…without jiggling. Who knows…maybe I will go to Starbucks on campus (I can FEEL the daggers through the screen!). It has been a long and short 8 weeks so far…
To be serious, maternity leave is hard. It isn’t a vacation for me. To help illustrate my point, I am coming back to write over at Liberating Working Moms today about how hard it is and how it is a main sign I am meant to work.
“We are coming down to the last few weeks of maternity and I have to say, this is the hardest job ever. Give me a landscaping job or something in construction and I doubt I would be as tired. I may not be showered or wearing different clothes from yesterday, but I exert more energy by 8:30am than I want to know.
Also? I am incredibly frustrated.
I give so much all day mentally and physically and have little to show for it. I am not trying to be super mom here either. I consider victory if he naps and I eat 3 meals. Dinner is mostly take out or something quick to throw together from Trader Joes. Most lunches are fast food because the walls of my house are caving in and I need to get out…and with an infant, that means drive thrus. On the flip side, I am getting a lot of walking in with an infant who wants to be in constant motion. He is usually strapped to me from about 4pm until after dinner (yes, I eat with him on so we can have some peace). I am not that far from pre-pregnancy weight…and that isn’t really bragging. I wish I could just sit down….[keep reading]“