The Other Landons

Kids say crazy things. We all know this. They smash together random things from books, TV and their friends and come up with crazy ass shit. But they usually are a one time thing. A simple laugh. A dream. But lately, Landon has been talking about “The Other Landons”.

At first, we laughed. Then we started looking at each other like “WTF?” So many stories about “well I am going to take this to show my other Landons”. “tomorrow I am going to my new school with the other Landons”.

They go to his “other school” and “live in the sky”.

He prefers them when he is in trouble “I’m going to be with my other Landons”.

It is hilarious and freaky as hell all at the same time. So, being the sarcastic, snarky parents we are, we have rolled with it.

When he is being a dick:”hey can we get one of those other Landon’s for the afternoon?”

When he isn’t listening: “You think the other Landon’s would be better listeners?”

When he won’t eat his dinner “I hear the other Landon’s love pasta salad”

But all of that made me start to think about a land of Landons would be like.

  • ALL THE JUICE
  • Mounds of smelly shoes
  • A disgusting bathroom
  • SO. MANY. BANDAIDS
  • If there was a bee, shit would be on lock down.
  • Massive riots over who got to be Twlight Sparkle
  • Pools of yogurt raisins.
  • Epic light saber battles.
  • A shit ton of Disney soundtracks.
  • No pants.
  • Everyone would be tatted in stickers…until bathtime.
  • People saying “chicken butt” all the time.
  • SCREAMS
  • A very non-diverse Netflix queue
  • Floors littered with Lego land mines. Like walking on damn glass.

landons

Clearly this land would become a TLC show and make me millions…

If your kid had a land of clones, what do you think would happen?

2 Comments

  1. So, a world of Landons would be a whole lot like a world of CJs . . . what is it about “chicken butt?” I mean, CJ doesn’t even ask the question, he just goes around saying “chicken butt” all of the time.

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