Landon 2.0

The one thing I heard the most while pregnant was “the second kid is easier”. I can say it was unanimous. Everyone said the second was easier. I went in thinking hoping I would be getting the opposite baby. Landon was pretty high needs. He didn’t want to sleep much during the day. The first few weeks were chaos. He was only happy in motion. We listened to the vacuum track over and over. He wasn’t super cuddly. It was hard. So this time I thought I would get an easier kid. Maybe he would sleep in the carseat while I ate lunch. Maybe he would love silence. Maybe he would be on cloud nine lying in my arms and playing in his play mat.

Welp folks…it didn’t happen. I know a lot of you are looking to me to pave the way in this kid #2 thing and I just want to say that line was bullshit. I got a Landon 2.0.

At first we thought he was easier. He let us put him down in the hospital and chill. We commented how Landon NEVER let us do that. As the weeks have gone on, the deja vu is insane. Last night I started holding him on his tummy and swinging him to stop crying…and I remembered…I did the EXACT same thing with Landon. I constantly have to move. In the Ergo, I sway all through lunch to keep him asleep. Silver lining here is the baby weight must be peeling off since I can barely eat and NOT be moving. In the car, if we hit a stop light, the world is crashing down. The vacuum is all I hear for a good 16 hours a day. So that dream baby I thought I would get…no where to be found. I love him to pieces, but he ain’t easy.

Now I do admit the situation of parenting second time around is easier. We aren’t having to discover all this. We know the tricks. We know it gets better. We can change a diaper at record speed. I know how to wake him up from sleeping while eating. We know what a routine kinda looks like for a little one….plus we have one we have to maintain. We know he will cry…and that’s ok. They cry…in your arms, in their bed, in the car…they just do. We have another human to cater to as well…so sometimes the crying just has to happen. We know to just survive at this point.

So basically my 2 major goals at this point are to get him to sleep and load him with calories.

Goal 1: Get him to sleep however I can. My goal usually is to get him to take his morning nap either in the crib or swing at home. This way I can pump, eat breakfast, drink some coffee and prepare. If he stays in the crib, I get a shower. The second nap is usually on the go. My anxiety can’t take the nap fighting all day so I just go. We have lunch with friends, walk Target, or just anything he can ride in the Ergo and sleep. I am praying for some cooler days so I don’t have to drive somewhere. Afternoon sometimes will allow a crib nap even if it is short and transfers to the swing to finish. The nap after that, during dinner, is the insane one. It almost always ends in a Ergo nap so we can play, make and eat dinner in peace. I think ideally he needs to go to bed more around 6:30 but it is hard to do that. With Landon we just ate after he went to bed but we can’t do that with Landon. I still want to have a family dinner…even if that means my boob out at the table. It isn’t my ideal but I have to work with what I’ve got. He can barely take about 50 minutes of awake time with feedings so it is a constant cycle all day to make sure he isn’t over tired.

Goal 2: Jack him full of food. I know it seems the more meat babies get on their bones, the happier they are all around. They sleep longer and just handle life a little better. So while we still majorly feed on a schedule, I top him off before every nap and he gets a small bottle before bed. It seems to be working because we can barely snap the newborn onesies anymore and moved up diaper size.

I know that if he truly is a Landon 2.0…6 months will be a magical age. He will be able to sit up and grab a toy for himself. My mom said I was the same way. Landon’s infant teacher pegged him from about week 10 for that transition. He really tranformed to a new kid. So check back in new year, I might be a new person too 🙂

P.S. I am holding out hope that Landon 2.0 also means easier toddler. Cmon karma!

14 Comments

  1. I love your honestly. So sorry the first weeks have been hard. I had a “hard” newborn as well, so I have an idea what you are going through. Hope he gets into a good nap schedule soon.

  2. I had the same thing!! There came a point where I wanted to punch every person who said ‘isn’t the second such as easy baby!’ Stella screamed for 5-7 hrs a day. Thanks for sharing! At least you’ve been there done that. Xoxox

  3. It’s funny–As the mother of 1 blessedly easy-going baby, all I keep hearing is how the second one will be the opposite and a complete nightmare! My MIL says this especially, since my husband was easy-going and my son is quite similar and his brother was a, well, complete nightmare! When we talked about how my son would sleep in the swaddle from the start, everyone would say, “Wait til the second one.”

    How are you feeling regards your reaction to the difficulties? Because you went through it once, do you find that you’re dipping into a store of knowledge that while it may not always have the answer, helps you feel less like you’re grasping for a solution? I feel like I’m constantly groping in the dark as I navigate the toddler boundary-pushing.

    • Yes! I know I have a harder baby. I’m not feeling like I am doing something wrong. And I know each week that goes by brings something new. Next up? Squealing and laughing. I imagine him laughing at Landon and get excited.

  4. Our first was a breeze and number two was ROUGH! Really, rough. Doesn’t mean I love her any less but it was hard. On top of her needs, we had a two year old that needed us and so there was a lot of crying (her and I) and a lot of pep talks from people!
    It does get better and a year later, I would love to go back and snuggle her more, accept the crying better and take in stride! Sounds like you are doing that and taking care of you by getting out etc…
    Hang in there momma- it truly flies by! 🙂

    • Thanks hun. I can say I do try to cuddle him more since he is the last one but I can also say I had no regrets with L. It was just hard and I needed to trudge through.

  5. First off just wanted to say, YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB!!! No matter how difficult it gets, no matter what Landon or Ollie throw your way it is apparent that you are doing the best job you can and you are doing it very, very well. Kudos, mama!

    Like some of the other comments I also had a relatively easy first born and all I keep hearing is the second is going to rock our worlds! I’m definitely nervous about that but at least we should be better equipped to handle things with our second. At least I hope so!

    • Now I did get the comment that the dynamic of 2 was harder but, I mean, duh. I just heard he would be easier. O wells. Maybe he will potty train in a month and rock as a toddler

  6. I definitely agree – my 2nd has not been easier at all – they each came with their own challenges, but he seems far needier – but I also can’t decide if that’s because he actually IS needier, or we just don’t have as much to give since his sister still needs (demands!) a lot of attention.

    I had the toughest time getting my son to nap on maternity leave and it drove me insane – I too had to just leave the house everyday so it wouldn’t be a nap battle every single day. Now he’s pretty much fine with naps and goes down fairly easily – daycare trained him well!

  7. I’ve heard this too, but after all the other things I was told about baby #1, I’m not believing anything. After being told E would sleep all the time as a newborn – hahaha. She didn’t sleep at all. She is just a perky kid that doesn’t require much sleep apparently. I’m afraid of what baby #2 is going to bring. He keeps having dance parties in my ute every night starting around 9:00 pm. Let’s hope this stops or we’re in for some challenging nights when he makes his grand appearance. Glad you are getting some routine down that works for you. It may not be perfect, but whoever said parenting was perfect?

  8. Everybody told me the opposite. They said that going to two was hard and that you didn’t really “parent” until you had two. My 2nd was a more difficult baby, marginally. His deal was sleeping, which he would never do alone until at 9 months, we finally let him cry-it-out (which totally worked, btw.) Also, he hated the swing and screamed in the car. I didn’t anticipate how hard having two would be, but can’t say I wasn’t warned. Now that I’m expecting the third, everyone tells me that the third kid is the easy one. We’ll see. At least now I know to pretty much expect the first six months or more to suck, so if people are right about the third, it can only be a bonus.

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