Cracks in my Rose Colored Glasses of Pregnancy

Snarky Preggo

Look! I'm in the bathroom...AGAIN

One fact about me that is pretty much always true is that I am a pretty fucking chipper person. I like finding the silver lining in all things. Keeps me going and helps me get people out of a funk. Negative nellies make me sad. It’s a talent really.

This is a God send when in my current condition of pregnancy. I LOVE pregnancy. I really do. I think I get MORE energy, my skin glows (some credit to L’oreal), my hair kicks ASS, I get pampered, people open doors for me, random strangers give me compliments…it is just the bee’s knees. And the food!!!! I am living it up as this will most likely be my last pregnancy. I want pop tarts after dinner? Hells yeah! I want to make a waffle sandwich for breakfast? Why the hell not? People even bring me smoothies (hi Kelly!). The lady selling the Roo cups basically gave me a high five for all my future icee purchases. See…pregnancy looks good on me.

All that being said, we have hit the point I get to complain. Only 5 weeks to go (or less) and I am finally feeling it. So because I don’t want to have post after post of me whining, here are my complaints:

  • Sleeping is hit or miss. I know. I know. I made it this far with no problems, I am lucky. I am making Kevin finally get the Snoogle down today to see if that helps support my belly and hips.
  • My belly is sore. I had this last time too around this point. The weight of my belly stretches the nerves at the top and makes me feel like I am constantly being bruised. If I recall correctly, soon the area will actually be numb to the touch but just hurt constantly. Joy
  • Bras are from the devil. Notice in the photo above, I am resorting to a cheap Target sports bra to take the pressure off the lack of space between my belly and boobs. I have no support but at least it isn’t adding to the pain.
  • It’s hot and I swear my building is in some kind of M.C. Escher painting where everywhere I go is up hill. Now little silver lining here, summer hasn’t really even hit NC until this week. It has been really nice and hot so humid…so I guess I can’t whine TOO much here.
  • My maternity bathing suits have given up hope on me. I had the one from Landon that was just gone. Lost the elasticity. The other one I ordered? Yeah boobs laughed in it’s face within a month. Since I am too cheap, I am just wearing my post partum suits from before. They work…well kinda. I love going to the pool to swim for exercise but I don’t think they are gonna last any longer. So yes, I am the mom at the splash park with the bikini. Now I just need that confidence at the SAS pool…
  • Last and CERTAINLY not least is my swollen junk (TMI TIME!). Once again, I am letting you non-preggers in on a “thing they don’t tell you” about pregnancy just like how I pee myself on a regular basis. This second time around (which I am told is common) the baby gets “comfortable” quicker. He settled right on in to my fetus house of a uterus and, in turn, altered my blood flow. My Dr. explained it that basically 50% more blood + gravity makes more travel south and how he is in there, it ain’t flowing back up at the same rate. Result? Swollen junk. Constantly. No amount of sitting, laying down or whatever helps. Some days are worse than others for no real reason. I spend many nights sitting on ice packs…it’s that bad. He tells me his wife had the same thing with their second and the minute the baby was here, it was all gone. Oh please.

And because I can’t just whine, a few silver linings about pregnancy from the week:

  • When I couldn’t get comfy in the bed on my left side, baby boy shifted to the left and I could make out distinct little feet kicking up. It was kinda cute…until I wanted to just go to sleep.
  • I swam like a freaking fish at the pool. It was so quiet and peaceful. Love that I have found some cardio that doesn’t just make me feel fat.
  • 2 people stopped me in the grocery store to tell me how awesome I looked pregnant. That never gets old.
  • Even though it is super hot and humid, my ankles and wrists really don’t swell. It also helps I have such a small frame that even a little swelling just makes me look normal.
  • I am still running at about 10 lbs lower than Landon’s pregnancy so I am hopeful it will be a shorter time to get back into clothes this time around.
  • Landon is “getting” it when we are putting “his” stuff in Dolphin’s room. He got his new reading nest (post soon) and we moved the chair out. He wasn’t upset and seemed to think it was nice for Dolphin to have it now. He likes to lay on my belly to watch TV at night. It is pretty sweet.

So there we go…I got it all out. I can’t say I will be quiet on Twitter though. 🙂


Update: So my due date almost twinsie wrote the EXACT SAME POST yesterday and I had no idea. So for more complaints…please see Katherine. We rock.


  1. Someone told me when I was pregnant that women either swell all over or their junk swells. I didn’t swell all over…… so I feel you on the junk swelling.

  2. My junk is swollen and has GIANT varicose veins to add to the fun. The best part is, my MIL told me a story about how one of her veins in that region burst when she gave birth to child 7 of 8. Fun stuff.

  3. Pingback: Kind of over it.

  4. Hahaha – yes, the swollen junk, yes! This is my 2nd time around too, and I swear it happened earlier this time than last. Just lovely. And hooray for being 10 lbs. lighter at this point than with Landon! I hope to stay within about the same range I gained last time (33 lbs.), but seeing as I’m already up 20 at nearly 22 weeks, I’m not feeling so confident about that one. 😉

  5. I’m new to your blog and I am absolutley loving it! I’m nearing the end of my first trimester with baby #2 and I have a 15 month old boy. I have to say, this pregnancy so far has been completely different than the first. I had morning sickness this time around and the hormones… don’t even get me started on the the hormones!!! I’m the same as you, I LOVE being pregnant but every once in a while we are still allowed to complain. The strangers in the store are right, you do look lovely!

  6. psh i complain way more than you & i’m not even thinking about having babies! as i said before, you’re like my pregnancy idol & when i finally decide to commit to being pregnant (even the swollen junk part) i hope to go into it with as much badassery & hotness as you did/do (no creep intended). seriously, you look better than most of the non-pregnant people i see on a daily basis.

  7. Oh man – nobody talks about the swelling. I’ve worn compression stockings throughout my pregnancies to combat this, but after any time on my feet, it still gets me.

    My stockings are sexy, especially in the heat of summer, yes.

    But if you can get away without the full leg compression – I recommend Maternity Spanks[x]. Some pressure in the groinal area will help a great deal. Just put them on before you get out of bed and don’t take them off until it’s time to sleep again. (or shower or whatever.)

    And there’s always.. this…

    I’ll be looking for you and BA at the sprayground after swim lessons this week..

  8. Pingback: Welcome Oliver Daniel: A Birth Story

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